Of the men we loved and lost

Strange how time flies.

Just the other day you were mourning. Bleeding your tears dry because the man you loved broke your heart. How could he? After all the two of you had been through, why would he crush your heart into pulp so mercilessly?

Hadn’t you given him your heart, soul, body and spirit?

Why?

But then it hit you that no one really owes us anything. It is unfair to think that just because you gave someone your love; they are indebted to offer the same to you. It would be unfair.

 And so you wept. For your broken heart, for the unkept promises, for your lost time but most of all, for your own healing.

Then came the bitterness. You vowed never to shed more tears. You vowed never to love another the way you did him.

 Waste of emotion and feelings.

 He didn’t deserve your tears. No man did.  And so you built a fortress around yourself. No one could hurt your feelings if you didn’t feel in the first place.

Sad thing is that the only person you hurt by not feeling was you.

You tried too hard not to feel that you remained an empty shell.

You were merely a pale ghost to the men that came after.  You were there; but not really there. There was no mental or emotional connection. Sex devoid of feeling. Kisses that didn’t mean a thing.

Tiresome.

***

 

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