I never thought I would ever look back at my life and be proud of my achievements. Well, this year has been exceptional for me more so because of the immense growth I have experienced as an individual.
I still don’t believe that I have come this far and have to pinch myself occasionally to confirm that it is indeed realistic and not a mere fabrication of dream world.
The average Jane mentality that had become ingrown in me faded into oblivion this year. Suddenly, I was this fearless woman who wanted to live life and become great. I took my first daring steps and believed in myself. For the first time in my life, I did not give a two cents about other people’s opinion. I did only the things that made me happy. And in my selfishness, I somehow become closer to those people around me which was pretty weird in itself.
The journey of self discovery is one each individual should deride in. I never knew me, and by not knowing myself, I played the chief villain in making my own life miserable. I was too scared of disappointing others that I ended up endlessly disappointing myself for the past two decades.
Well, I sure am glad that the depression that led to this self realization struck me. I have learnt to believe in me, that I am a good person, that I can excel in the stuff that I love doing. Along the way, I became surprised of my own capabilities. Whoever knew so much potential lay hidden inside my soul all along, only awaiting discovery.
This year, I made myself proud. I crossed out all the things that were on my twenties bucket list. The dream of singing in a band and joining a choir, I became more than just a bathroom singer. The timidity that existed inside me is now but just history, and so are the esteem issues that I have been like dead weights round my neck.
I got to actually earn a living doing what I love most, Writing. That must have been the greatest achievement of all. Yes, it wasn’t much, but the feeling of pride that swelled in my heat could not be compared to anything in this world. I cannot trade the satisfaction I felt holding that pay cheque in my hand for anything; the tears of joy I shed, God knows how great it felt. Then came the opportunity to write for my professional body’s journal. The first time I saw my column article, I could not sleep. Felt like Neil Armstrong taking those steps on the moon, a concoction of pure bliss that words cannot describe.
The journals will have to be framed and stored somewhere in my treasure chest of achievements; my kids have to see this. At least they will have something to be proud about.
Life has been good this year, I got to work and experience firsthand how it will be being an adult, earning your own keep, paying rent and bills. It will be tiresome I know, but the pay will be rewarding. I got to meet people way out of my league, professionals and co-operate heads. Somehow, I know I will make an astounding career woman based on the recommendations I got from my superiors.
So yes, I nailed life this year. I have lived. I have become a socially acceptable person. I have made friends whom I know will stick for life. I am happy with the adult I have become. And no, I still haven’t succumbed to the temptations of campus life. I still haven’t tasted liquor nor drunk myself silly. I still haven’t brought home a baby because of any sexual irresponsibility. Neither do I have dozens of Ex’s baying for my blood for relationships gone sour. I’m pretty sure momma would be as proud of me as I am of myself if she were here.
It’s a wrap 2013, you have been good to me, you’ve given me the confidence I need to conquer greater heights and I thank the Good Lord for all the paths that were opened. There’s no looking back from here. I have tasted the good life and there’s no way I am ever going back. Here’s to a year well lived.
2014 Bring It On!!!